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:iconyournotagoodbye: More from yournotagoodbye


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Submitted on
August 6, 2006
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They said you were like a fish-
spending your life in the depths only to resurface in a world you couldn't breathe in.

And I always thought
you were a wonderful prelude
to a damning life.

Now cover girl, you don't cover up anything.
Your makeup does not hide your flaws as you walk to the ocean and drown yourself.
The beach is your last runway, the lightening your last flash.

You yelled          "Call this one 'Hollywood'"       over your shoulder.

[He told me you do not know how to swim.]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"He's so handsome."
Yeah. He can't keep his hands off other girls and then some.

The boy took away the air you couldn't afford to lose.
He stomped on your lungs when you overheard him-

"She is the balloons that touch the ceiling at a birthday party.
After a few days you will want to throw her away."

Your smile crashed in the same way that the waves do.
You pulled yourself back and felt your heart sink.

Tonight you do a breathy version of "Itsy Bitsy Spider"
where the sun doesn't come out.
"la lalove washed ME out"

You put your hand up to my ear
in the way little kids tell secrets
and whisper
"...the world itself is a bad dream."
[That was the last thing you told me.]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The ocean blue swallows you and the splashing stops.
[Tonight that boy turned famous.]

He grabbed your hand to lift you out of the water for a moment and said
"Angel, I won't wake you up so that you have more time to have nightmares."
Your fingers slipped out of his grip and you coughed and sputtered until you started floating.

I pull you out of the water the same way you used to pull the whole world in.

Your name was Vogue
and you did not smile in your pictures.
story: [you might want to read this description AFTER reading the actual poem]
a famous model falls in love with a boy and overhears him talking about her. no good. he's using her so that he can get press coverage and be well-known. [which he eventually gets because he's the cause of the magazine covergirl's suicide.] she feels trapped in the shallow world that has become her life. [in this, i'm her best/only friend.]


this is the first poem i've written in months that's actually my style.

which means it jumps around.
alot.

ohwell,
:)
Add a Comment:
 
:iconwyld-flower:
wyld-flower Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2008  Professional Traditional Artist
brilliant!!! :)
Reply
:iconledbypassion:
ledbypassion Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
"Tonight you do a breathy version of "Itsy Bitsy Spider"
where the sun doesn't come out.
"la lalove washed ME out""

okay, stop being amazing.
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Nov 14, 2007
:)
Reply
:iconblacktutu:
blacktutu Featured By Owner May 25, 2007   Writer
Beautiful, I love how you use metaphors in your writing, you write with a rare quality that can draw a casual browser in and want to know more.
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner May 29, 2007
:heart:
:heart:

thank you very very much.
Reply
:iconwritten-wings:
Written-Wings Featured By Owner May 17, 2007
amazing. love how this is styled story form. i'll definately read more of yours.
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner May 23, 2007
:heart:
Reply
:iconkatiesfriend:
KatiesFriend Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2007
Wow. This is wonderful.
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2007
thank you so much for the watch and the fav !

:)
Reply
:iconkatiesfriend:
KatiesFriend Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2007
Your writting are really good, you deserve the fave/ watch. That piece is gorgious.
Reply
:iconkatiesfriend:
KatiesFriend Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2007
Oh dear. I can't seem to spell tonight >>" Your writting is...** (Much better)
Reply
:iconpisciculus:
Pisciculus Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2007  Student Writer
I love this so much.

Your smile crashed in the same way that the waves do.
You pulled yourself back and felt your heart sink.

I think those are my favorite lines, but really i need the whole thing. It all just works together. Def :+fav:
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2007
:hug:

thank you very much for the favorite !
Reply
:iconturtbub:
turtbub Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2006
i like this a lot. the breaks in the story, pauses, changes of description, really great. i love your style.
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2006
thank you for the :+fav:!
Reply
:iconsilverangel38:
silverangel38 Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2006
Amazing poem, as usual. I feel your work so much! You could make really good money out of this!
Reply
:iconenchanted-black-rose:
enchanted-black-rose Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2006  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I know i've commented this one before; but I just had to stop by and let you know that this is my favourite thing written here. I read it every single day. No lie. It's amazing; you're amazing.
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Oct 10, 2006
:heart:
:heart:
:heart:
Reply
:iconblawck:
Blawck Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2006   Photographer
love it
man oh man, you are fabulous
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2006
You're fabulous
and your comments make me smile
:hug:
Reply
:iconblawck:
Blawck Featured By Owner Oct 6, 2006   Photographer
heehee.
*smiles*
well i'm glad i could make you smile.
Reply
:iconhaven-spear:
haven-spear Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2006
Great story, well done. :]
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2006
thank you for the favorite:)
Reply
:iconblack-pen:
black-pen Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2006
I just got around to reading this Jocy. I like it a lot. I agreed. It is your style, totally - which means I have to read it a few time over. Therefore, a deffinite favorite.
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2006
=D
Reply
:iconseeminglydepressed91:
SeeminglyDepressed91 Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2006  Student Photographer
wow. it's a beautiful piece. and the fact that it's jumpy just seems to work. i love the image of the ocean that comes up throughout the poem.it's got an amazing amount of emotion. you're really great with words. well written.
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2006
:heart:

wow, thank you.
Reply
:iconseeminglydepressed91:
SeeminglyDepressed91 Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2006  Student Photographer
haha you are very much welcome.
Reply
:iconenchanted-black-rose:
enchanted-black-rose Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2006  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Girl; do you realize how much talent you have? My mouth was hanging open. Not literally...but if I had the energy, it would be. Definite favourite; absolutely beautiful.

Oh, & I tried to add you on MySpace, but I couldn't find your add button. :hmm:
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2006
Oh thank you sooooo much!
:hug:
[for the watch too.]

btw,
i just realized the myspace thing
i'm fixing it right now
:)
Reply
:iconchari:
chari Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2006
i love your style - the way it jumps around ~
i read the poem first, then read the despcription, then had to read it again. i find something new everytime i read it :heart: ;]
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2006
:)

thank you!
for the favorite too
Reply
:iconinnocence-maintained:
Innocence-Maintained Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2006
wonderful wonderful imagry...the ocean through out the whole piece is lovely.
also, nice jumpy structure!!! :D

Luisa xoox
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2006
thank you for the favorite!
:heart:
Reply
:iconpurpl3sky:
Purpl3Sky Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2006
this was really, really, amazing.

i love how it jumps around. :)
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2006
awh,

thank you.
:)
Reply
:iconfrogcess:
FrogCess Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2006
I don't know what to tell you anymore.
You're a person I don't even know, you have a live at the other side of the world and still I get to see words you might not even show to some close friends...

It's funny&&sad, while the whole world lives someone dies alone or feels alone cause no one cares...

Yeah, I have my moments ^^ You're great baby!!
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2006
you're right, it's crazy.

thank you so much.
:heart:
Reply
:iconxparis-in-flames:
xparis-in-flames Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
holy shit jocelyn.

...that's all i got. (i'm at a loss for words on this one)
:+fav:
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2006
thnx so much tori!
:hug:
Reply
:iconblablaskunk:
blablaskunk Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2006   Writer
Amazing! Seriously!!! :] Your poetry takes me to a whole other place!!!
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2006
thank you.
it's amazing to know that.
:)
Reply
:iconn-one:
N-One Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2006  Hobbyist Writer
Incredible, as always

I know I've said this many, many times before, but you have a skill with words, I only wish I had

It's amazing - seriously, you need a career out of this or something :D
Reply
:iconyournotagoodbye:
yournotagoodbye Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2006
I always lalalove compliments from you. :giggle:

lol.
but nope,
no career here for me.
Reply
:iconn-one:
N-One Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2006  Hobbyist Writer
why not?

it's good enough to make you mega-bucks easily
Reply
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