[x]

BreakEvenAtDowncast.I remember staring at the cracks, looking for where the rain falls through.
Those yellow walls seemed to stifle me
when my father called and told me he was sorry
And he loved me.

Tears threated my eyes with that beautiful commodity.
              (No one knows the semantics behind "I love you")

I stared at the sky until the stars behind my eyes collided.
Thinking "This will never be something that keeps me awake."
                        (From then on, everything kept me awake.)

                                   The bird on my window said
                              "Hello, my wings do not work."
                    I pushed him

RyeAndAirI was thinking you make me feel things that I couldn't buy with a million bucks.
You crash my train of thought with
"Let's never talk about this or bring it up again."
"Okay. I agree."
I cant figure out what lies even mean anymore.
All I know is my eyes sting and my throat isn't working very well.
I manage a small wave and walk away as fast as I can without actually
b r e a k i n g i n t o a r u n .
Tonight I'll take pills and fall asleep with the t.v. on.
You called after me "Darling, we'll be seeing eachother soon."
I love you. And I'll never look you in the eyes again.
I woke up on the up

I Saw Stars"Reach for the stars" you said.

I stood on tip toe and felt the air close in on me.
I was reaching for oxygen as much as stars.
My eyes and my lungs needed more than I could get.

You sit on the moon, swinging your feet, laughing.
Tears fall from my eyes and you yell down at me
"If you were at the height I am, you could pass that off for rain."

I ran inside the abandoned building that used to be "home".
The peeling paint chipped and when I looked, it was under my fingernails.
I scrapped my way to the room at the very top.
I looked up at the small lightbulb and watched it flicker out.

The window was missing too, a tree bra

LIFEThe boys' and girls' bare feet were sinking in the green grass and sunlight backlit their shapes against the sky.

She twirled towards him, still wearing the delicate white dress she had worn on stage minutes ago.
                        "You missed it. I was beautiful."
           "What are you talking about? You are beautiful."

Lights danced in her eyes and she laughed softly.
                     "Bet you can't catch me."
He grabbed her hand and said "I've already got you."
               "Not for long" she teased.
                                He pulled her closer and whispered

ItsAlmostLikeAHurricane You've got miles to go until you get to me.
                    You've got miles to go until you  sink this low .
                                 "I want you to hit rock bottom"
                          My pearly whites cracked on impact.

A little girl tugged on my dress and said "that boy doesnt love you"
         I squinted up at the sky and said on a sigh "I believe you're right."
To my surprise she had tears painting her face.
             "Don't give up. You dont care about something until you've lost it."
When my eyes refocused she was gone.
                           I sat down on a bench and on my left s

TheSkyWontBeBlueByTheTimeYou..Weak in the knees, you don't feel a thing.
                                    I'm the one who ends up falling.

You notice my eyes light up everytime they land on you.
                        (i'm like christmas lights. you can be electricity.)
And you couldn't crack this smile with an 80 pound cinderblock.
You make me stutter.
I can hold my breath. I just can't seem to catch it.

Every look,smile,touch?
It confuses me.
How come I feel everything and you're stuck at level     zero   .

We're in the same car- i'm going 90 and you're going backwards.

                                  Fields on a mono

Next Exit 30 MilesOn the sidewalk, out of breath.
                                            The boy held out his hand, she tried not to take it.
                                            The girl held out her heart, the boy wouldn't break it.

                                                     The little stuttering kids were in love.
                                                                   liar liar, wrap her in piano wire
                                                                        They were just out of it.

She ran into the cathedral to cure her broken heart.
He walked in r

FactoriesAndFailures"Yes,"

she said.
"you make life beautiful
and loving you is living it in the best way,
it's timeless."
His smile radiates complete happiness as he pulls her into his arms.
"It's like it's always been like this, will be this way forever,"
he breathes in her hair.

They were classic.

Then he met Heroine.
The type that doesn't save people
and he as good as yelled
"Forever is over."

Days, weeks, months, passed and she stayed awake for lonely nights.
One day at dinner she attempted a watery smile
                  [to wash out a dry conversation]
       "Hey boy, I dance on water."
His face remained calm as he muttered

Last.Look.Crushed.You're crushing me.
Boy, do I wish.
You see, I've got starry eyes for you but its only hurting me.
You're breaking hearts like its going out of style, but thats not "the bad part"
You don't want to shatter mine.
Call it my masochistic side, but give it a shot.
Bring a knife and give me a chance.

im
just
out
of
chances

"forget highschool crushes and grow up"
I can't.
Yellow flowers still make me swoon
and forehead kisses still make me smile.
You still make me nervous.
I'm not pretty but I still keep you on your toes.
With flaws we're batting a thousand, but
it just feels perfect.

No
It feels completely wrong that my breath

Downhill. Lose your Drive.MONDAYMONDAY.
i met him today.
i met you today-
the boy that will change my life.

TUESDAYTUESDAY.
my feet sink in this blindingly white carpet.
there is a trail of yellow flower petals winding it's way across the floor.
i would follow it, but i'm not sure what's at the end.
i throw away my nerves and thoughts and slowly step along the path.
it's you: you're the end.

WEDNESDAYWEDNESDAY.
I lay in the dark and wait for the part that you sing to me. When I called you my little songbird, you grinned boyishly and gave me a half hearted shove that caused me to laugh until I fell to the floor, holding my sides. You held my hands like we w

Stages And ActsI take careful steps to the center of the stage, pull a deep breath, and yell
                          "This isnt what I meant it to be."

Excuse: "forced myself to cry"  Truth: "I cant keep myself together these days."

I'm up. Wish me luck. Break a leg, break a heart, whatever.
                                "my eyes water so bad now, they're almost always
                                 black. my problem's gotten so bad now, my teeth
                                 are turning black."
I falter.
Do you like my smile?
                                 "I'm giving up on everything.

Nervous Meets FashionableWind blows hair across my eyes.
                        Trust me. I'm trying to smile, and I'm trying my absolute best.

Gazes are still locked.
[it doesn't matter, we've lost the key anyway]

dolly dolly dolly,
the best isn't ever good enough.

The cliche love of walking on the beach has turned into a real mind hater.
I swear, I could look out over the water and see my heart sinking.
               [The moon might illuminate the drowning scene.]
Despite the sun going down.
Concentration of cold hearts.

You

3am WaterworksWide eyes shot butterflies,
my organs contained them in a cage.
I sat, studied, I'd explain-
"I heard a drop of "self control" and "confidence in God."
Watched it shatter, shake, disintergrate-
We'd stop, we'd kiss, we'd hold, and you'd say-
"Breathe ,Girlie, breathe. Breathe babe please pray for me.
Cause I'm hands felt on spines
trembling nerves as I push the rewind
to hear a delayed message of regret but I'll keep-
pressing on-to new people, new mattress and rum.
Turning down second dates like telemarketers calling me at dawn.
Made

tights , toe shoes , troubleWe're kissing in a closet.
Not exactly a stage, but I've got high nerves anyway.
My feet are arched to a ballerina's point and I'm all but
                        'falling out of my jewelry box'

                      "I'm off to the city. I Breathe Broadway."

You Said:       "Forget it, doll. Forget coming back to me. I wont want you by

DevelopingATasteForTheWater"you dont have to act nervous around me."
easy for you to say.
it'd be easier for me to do if you'd stop staring at me with those clever green eyes.
(and please, stop talking so sweet that every word hits me in the back of the legs.)
When we both know I'm not worth it.
And you're not even desperate.
Cause you know, I like illusions.

We shouldn't jump into love like its a swimming pool.
You never bother testing the water.
I do. An inch at a time.
But you had to keep going sweet talker.
Had to contradict every excuse.
Had to look me in the eyes,
make me bite my lip,
re-think everything.
How'd you know my heart was in my eyes and

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More from ~yournotagoodbye

Downhill. Lose your Drive.MONDAYMONDAY.
i met him today.
i met you today-
the boy that will change my life.

TUESDAYTUESDAY.
my feet sink in this blindingly white carpet.
there is a trail of yellow flower petals winding it's way across the floor.
i would follow it, but i'm not sure what's at the end.
i throw away my nerves and thoughts and slowly step along the path.
it's you: you're the end.

WEDNESDAYWEDNESDAY.
I lay in the dark and wait for the part that you sing to me. When I called you my little songbird, you grinned boyishly and gave me a half hearted shove that caused me to laugh until I fell to the floor, holding my sides. You held my hands like we w

ery,miss society.She lies in a field of wild flowers with her eyes closed.
The sun hits every angle of her face and what society would call "weeds".
This is the most glamourous that she has ever felt.

In the distance she can hear the construction; more "sky scrapers" being built every second, slowly closing in on this meadow.

She sings "Cloudy morning, my own early bird will save me."
A shadow falls across her face and a voice says "hey familiar".
She looks up at a brilliant smile that doesn't quite reach the eyes of the boy staring down at her.
tie, suit, the boy she couldn't sweat out.
White dress, composed, the golden sky enhanced

scene in an airplaneClouds are touching the circle-shaped windows that are placed next to every seat.
Sunlight breaking through and tapping on the glass.
50,000 feet.

Discursive and nervous I ask the man next to me if we can go down to just 50.
He says No, not without crashing.
I tell the man that the birds are making me nervous;
they're too loud.
He says Don't worry, the sky is getting dark.
I ask
Can we really fly through storms?
He says "nothing".
Rain starts to fall, why is my face getting wet?
He says Calm down, do something to make you calm down.
I stand and move to the aisle
and I'm dancing, fingers brushing the luggage rack.
As the thunder

BreakEvenAtDowncast.I remember staring at the cracks, looking for where the rain falls through.
Those yellow walls seemed to stifle me
when my father called and told me he was sorry
And he loved me.

Tears threated my eyes with that beautiful commodity.
              (No one knows the semantics behind "I love you")

I stared at the sky until the stars behind my eyes collided.
Thinking "This will never be something that keeps me awake."
                        (From then on, everything kept me awake.)

                                   The bird on my window said
                              "Hello, my wings do not work."
                    I pushed him

Wrong Side of ParadiseI am gripping balloons in an elevator.
Dropping  d e g r e e   b y   d e g r e e .

My stomach is full of butterflies that are trying to claw their way out my throat.
              ("Oh forecaster, I will catch the wind.")
Silence pounds in my ears as I grab your hand and watch as it turns white under pressure.
                                    We hit pacific heights.
                                    Water flooded in from all sides.
                It is rising past my heels, up my legs, to the fringe of my dress.
    Lights flicker out and my erratic breathing confuses my lungs to the point of giving up.

                It will

ItsAlmostLikeAHurricane You've got miles to go until you get to me.
                    You've got miles to go until you  sink this low .
                                 "I want you to hit rock bottom"
                          My pearly whites cracked on impact.

A little girl tugged on my dress and said "that boy doesnt love you"
         I squinted up at the sky and said on a sigh "I believe you're right."
To my surprise she had tears painting her face.
             "Don't give up. You dont care about something until you've lost it."
When my eyes refocused she was gone.
                           I sat down on a bench and on my left s

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MyLittleFish

by ~yournotagoodbye, Aug 6, 2006, 1:03:04 PM
Literature / Poetry / Human Nature / Free Verse

^{They said you were like a fish-

spending your life in the depths only to resurface in a world you couldn't breathe in.

And I always thought

you were a wonderful prelude

to a damning life.

Now cover girl, you don't cover up anything.

Your makeup does not hide your flaws as you walk to the ocean and drown yourself.

The beach is your last runway, the lightening your last flash.

You yelled "Call this one 'Hollywood'" over your shoulder.

[He told me you do not know how to swim.]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"He's so handsome."

Yeah. He can't keep his hands off other girls and then some.

The boy took away the air you couldn't afford to lose.

He stomped on your lungs when you overheard him-

"She is the balloons that touch the ceiling at a birthday party.

After a few days you will want to throw her away."

Your smile crashed in the same way that the waves do.

You pulled yourself back and felt your heart sink.

Tonight you do a breathy version of "Itsy Bitsy Spider"

where the sun doesn't come out.

"la lalove washed ME out"

You put your hand up to my ear

in the way little kids tell secrets

and whisper

"...the world itself is a bad dream."

[That was the last thing you told me.]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The ocean blue swallows you and the splashing stops.

[Tonight that boy turned famous.]

He grabbed your hand to lift you out of the water for a moment and said

"Angel, I won't wake you up so that you have more time to have nightmares."

Your fingers slipped out of his grip and you coughed and sputtered until you started floating.

I pull you out of the water the same way you used to pull the whole world in.

Your name was Vogue

and you did not smile in your pictures.}

MyLittleFishby ~yournotagoodbye

Literature / Poetry / Human Nature / Free Verse

©2006-2013 ~yournotagoodbye

^{story: [you might want to read this description AFTER reading the actual poem]

a famous model falls in love with a boy and overhears him talking about her. no good. he's using her so that he can get press coverage and be well-known. [which he eventually gets because he's the cause of the magazine covergirl's suicide.] she feels trapped in the shallow world that has become her life. [in this, i'm her best/only friend.]

this is the first poem i've written in months that's actually my style.

which means it jumps around.

alot.

ohwell,}

~wyld-flower Apr 15, 2008 Professional Traditional Artist

brilliant!!!

Reply

~ledbypassion Nov 9, 2007 Hobbyist Writer

"Tonight you do a breathy version of "Itsy Bitsy Spider"
where the sun doesn't come out.
"la lalove washed ME out""

okay, stop being amazing.

Reply

~yournotagoodbye Nov 14, 2007

Reply

~blacktutu May 25, 2007 Writer

Beautiful, I love how you use metaphors in your writing, you write with a rare quality that can draw a casual browser in and want to know more.

Reply

~yournotagoodbye May 29, 2007

thank you very very much.

Reply

~Written-Wings May 17, 2007

amazing. love how this is styled story form. i'll definately read more of yours.

Reply

~yournotagoodbye May 23, 2007

Reply

~KatiesFriend Apr 7, 2007

Wow. This is wonderful.

Reply

~yournotagoodbye Apr 10, 2007

thank you so much for the watch and the fav !

Reply

~KatiesFriend Apr 12, 2007

Your writting are really good, you deserve the fave/ watch. That piece is gorgious.

Reply